Sabbatical
by Jedi Keladry
Summary: Obi-Wan takes a holiday to rest and mourn after the death of his knight-master. A mishap with Queen Amidala brings them together in an unexpected way, and they develop a friendship. Obidala warning!
1. Ordinary World

****

Title: Sabbatical

****

Setting: Naboo, in the days after TPM

****

Category: Obidala (friendship mostly) multi-songfic

****

Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi and Queen Amidala

****

Rating: PG

****

Status: Work in Progress

****

Summary: Obi-Wan takes a sabbatical to rest and mourn after the death of his knight-master. A mishap with Queen Amidala (literally) brings them together in an unexpected way, and they develop a friendship as he rests.

****

Author's Note and Disclaimer: Each song is the intellectual property of its copyright holder/composer/lyricist/artist(s). The Star Wars universe and all characters are the property of George and Lucasfilm. I'm not making any money off of this.   
  
***   
_  
Pride's gone out the window, 'cross the rooftops, run away,   
Left me in the vacuum of my heart.   
What is happening to me?   
Crazy, some will say.   
Where is my friend when I need you most? Gone away.   
  
But I won't cry for yesterday.   
There's an ordinary world somehow I have to find.   
And as I try to make my way to the ordinary world   
I will learn to survive.   
  
Papers in the roadside tell of suffering and grief;   
Fear today, forgot tomorrow.   
Beside the news of holy war and holy need,   
Our is just a little sorrow.   
  
And I don't cry for yesterday.   
There's an ordinary world somehow I have to find.   
And as I try to make my way to the ordinary world   
I will learn to survive.   
  
I will learn to survive._   
  
**"Ordinary World" - Duran Duran**   
  
*   
  
"But I want to stay here, with you," protested Anakin.   
  
"Anakin, even if I was going back to Coruscant with you and the masters, we wouldn't see each other for several months. You need to catch up on your education with the other younglings. Within a year, you'll be ready to keep up." _And I'll be ready to be a knight-master_, Obi-Wan Kenobi added silently.   
  
Master Yoda laid a hand on Anakin's shoulder, silencing the boy's rebuttal. The diminutive master looked up at the new knight. "To you a sabbatical has been granted, Obi-Wan. Use your time wisely, and ready for your new duties, you will be." Obi-Wan bowed slightly and retreated as the masters and new padawan boarded their ship.   
  
One of the queen's handmaidens was waiting by his one-man fighter as he approached. She raised her voice to be heard over the roaring of the engines. "Her highness has learned that you are taking a holiday from your duties."   
  
"Of sorts," Obi-Wan bellowed. He waved at the ship, just in case Anakin was at a viewport.   
  
"She desires me to say, if you wish to stay here, a suite of rooms has been readied for you in the Palace."   
  
He had given no thought as to where he might go, only to securing time off. This was as good a place as any. "Please thank her, I am honored to accept."   
  
The handmaiden bowed. "The honor is ours, Sir. If you will fly your ship to the main hangar, a servant will meet you there." She backed up for a few steps, then turned and glided away.   
  
***


	2. True Colors

***

You with the sad eyes, don't be discouraged.   
Though I realize it's hard to take courage.   
In a world full of people, you can lose sight of it all,   
And the darkness inside you can make you feel so small.   
  
Show me a smile then. Don't be unhappy,   
Can't remember when I last saw you laughing   
If this world makes you crazy, and you've taken all you can bear,   
You call me up, because you know I'll be there.   
  
And I'll see your true colors shining through.   
I see your true colors, and that's why I love you!   
So don't be afraid to let them show -   
Your true colors, true colors are beautiful, like a rainbow.   
  
"True Colors" - Cyndi Lauper   
  
*   
  
Sure enough, another handmaiden was there as he landed in the hangar. He leaped to the deck and approached her. To Obi-Wan's surprise, instead of normal servile mannerisms, this girl extended her hand and met his gaze. Her face was in shadow, but her familiar smile shone through the darkness that shrouded her face. He bowed, then clasped her hand. "Your highness, you didn't have to meet me."   
  
"And you didn't have to bow. You, Anakin, and Master Jinn are elevated to the peerage, haven't you heard?"   
  
Grieving-grey eyes looked to the young queen for elaboration. "Peerage?"   
  
Queen Amidala nodded as they began to walk. "An obsolete term in a democracy, but like my title, it's a throwback to the age of true monarchy. You are honored on Naboo as I am, and you do not bow to anyone."   
  
It was more than he wanted to process right now, so he changed the subject. "I am very grateful for your hospitality, your highness."   
  
"It is I and my people who are grateful. You are welcome here as long as you wish to stay," she said.   
  
He only nodded, a meager smile on his face, so she led the rest of the way to the security office in silence. The officers on duty established a code clearance for the newly-knighted Jedi, giving him access to most of the Palace and its resources. On through the ring-shaped Palace Complex they walked, headed for the Ambassador's Wing.   
  
Obi-Wan barely noticed the distance. He and Master Qui-Gon had run though halls similar to these on their way to the hangar, mere minutes before they both died. Obi-Wan was still breathing, his heart was still beating, but he didn't know why. From the age of thirteen, he had not known a day without Master Jinn. He was being forced to go on alone, yet his knight-master's presence was everywhere.   
  
Queen Amidala led him to a suite of four rooms. He went to the window and looked into the courtyard as she told him where the amenities were. Then she joined him at the window. "The largest balcony you see there is my room," she said, pointing. "And the waterfall is out in that direction, if you feel like taking a walk. The view is spectacular from there."   
  
He could only summon a feeble smile, so she led Obi-Wan to the sopha and pushed him onto it. Queen Amidala handed him a slip of flimsiplast with an eight-digit code on it. He glanced at it, then at her. "Questions, complaints, someone to talk to, dial this as the destination address in your message center system." She gestured to the commstation that sat on a desk. "I check these messages twice a day, and I am the only one to see them."   
  
The queen knelt before him, her large eyes sorrowful and compassionate. She took one of his hands in both of her soft, manicured ones. Her voice softened as she said, "All that I have to give is yours for the asking, such is my gratitude for your and your master's service and protection. You may go or stay as you wish." She watched the muscles clench in his jaw, and mourned at the sight of the purple circles under his eyes.   
  
Queen Amidala rose and took a step toward the door, then returned to stand before the young Jedi. He looked so tired as she gazed down into his miserable face. "Master Obi-Wan, I am very sorry for your loss." Obi-Wan felt an all-too familiar prickling in his eyes. The sight of tears on the young queen's face were blurred by his own as she left the young Jedi alone.   
  
She didn't see him for two tendays.   
  
***


	3. Beware of Darkness

***   
  
_Watch out now, take care   
Beware of the thoughts that linger   
Winding up inside your head   
The hopelessness around you   
In the dead of night   
Beware of sadness   
  
It can hit you   
It can hurt you   
Make you sore and what is more   
That is not what you are here for_   
  
**"Beware of Darkness" - George Harrison **  
  
*   
  
Obi-Wan watched Queen Amidala leave the sitting room; heard the door close behind her. He was grateful for her kindness, but he'd wanted nothing more than to be alone. But now that he was alone, he didn't know what to do. He'd never been alone before.   
  
_There is no death. There is only the Force._   
  
Obi-Wan knew that he was tired, that his body was still suffering from the effects of shock from his master's death, but he hadn't been able to sleep, or even stay still for very long, since it happened.   
  
_What do I do, Master? You've left me all alone, I don't know how to mourn you, you were gone before I could say goodbye. You didn't even say goodbye, you would only talk about Anakin._   
  
Anakin.   
  
_How am I supposed to train him? They may have knighted me, but my own training wasn't really finished._   
  
Obi-Wan stumbled into the bedroom. He tugged his boots and outer clothes off, then collapsed onto the bed and sobbed.   
  
***


	4. Here's that Rainy Day

***   
  
_I should have saved all those leftover dreams   
Funny, but here's that rainy day!   
Here's that rainy day they told me about   
And I laughed at the thought that it might turn out this way.   
Where is that worn-out wish that I threw aside   
After it brought my love so near?   
Funny how love becomes a cold, rainy day…   
Funny. That rainy day is here._   
  
**"Here's that Rainy Day" - Frank Sinatra **  
  
*   
  
Even though his mind was still weary, the newly-knighted Jedi grew restless. He had spent twenty days in his suite in deep mourning for Master Qui-Gon. Obi-Wan finally took a cue from his body and emerged from his rooms, determined to face the open air again. Granted, it was an hour after midnight, so he probably wouldn't have to face any people, but it was a step in the right direction. Obi-Wan made his way out of the Palace buildings, headed for the waterfall that the queen had pointed out to him.   
  
Ten minutes later, he stood on a boulder near the waterfall. Obi-Wan listened to the water rush over the edge, the white noise buzzing through his mind. He closed his eyes and imagined that the river that fed the waterfall was running through him, cleansing his spirit of his failures.   
  
It didn't work, but it was worth a shot. Obi-Wan glanced over the side, down to the Southeed Plain. Fog obscured most of the view, but he could just make out the dark, serpentine river that continued hundreds of meters below. Then something caught his eye about twenty meters down. A plateau jutted out from the cliffs. Hundreds of tall bushes had been planted on it in a regular pattern. It was a huge elliptical maze, and he could see an obelisk in the center of it. It had to be over twenty thousand square meters in area.   
  
_Perfect_. The waterfall was forgotten as Obi-Wan searched for the top of the steps. Once found, he trotted down the switchbacks carved into the side of the cliffs. Obi-Wan entered the maze as soon as he reached the plateau. The hedges were in full flower, reminding him that it was summer.   
  
Obi-Wan had sought something to keep his mind occupied – well, here it was. The moon peeked through the clouds and illuminated the maze as he stepped in. Obi-Wan jogged through the paths, not really caring where he was going, and let the memories of his friend and surrogate father flood his mind. He ran faster through the maze, turning corners and racing down corridors, tears sliding down his cheeks.   
  
Thunder sounded. He hadn't noticed the clouds moving in. Obi-Wan had no idea where in the maze he was; the thick fog obscured any light source that might have told him which way the cliffs were. He couldn't even see the obelisk. The Jedi felt a raindrop on his hand and hissed in irritation; he had no desire to spend his holiday fighting pneumonia. The rain began in earnest a minute later; so did his efforts to find an exit. He rounded a corner and was fairly certain that he saw an outlet through the torrent. Obi-Wan sprinted toward it.   
  
About halfway to his goal, he caught a glimpse of someone else emerging from another corridor. He'd been so preoccupied with getting out that he hadn't sensed her presence. Even with his exceptional reflexes, Obi-Wan was too close and going too fast to stop or dodge, and so was this other person. They crashed into each other at full speed. He bounced face-first into a hedge. The other person was much smaller – he had sent her flying.   
  
Obi-Wan laid facedown in the mud. A myriad of small abrasions on his face, ears, and hands began to bleed. He spit out a leaf and raised himself to his hands and knees, looking to his left.   
  
The person with whom he'd collided had crashed into another bush, then fallen to the ground, too. He wiped mud and rain out his eyes. It was one of the queen's handmaidens. _Or_, he remembered, _it might be the queen herself_. He shook his head to clear it and got to his feet, staggering, then collapsed with a graceless thump in the grass beside her. "Are you all right?"   
  
"Ouch," she gasped. She looked up just as lightning illuminated the area.   
  
_Blast_, he thought. "Your highness?" he shouted over the thunder. She nodded, biting her lip. Her pretty face was contorted. "What is it?"   
  
"My chest hurts," she panted.   
  
Obi-Wan nodded. He stood and made sure he was stable on his feet. "Let's get you inside," he said, loudly enough to be heard over the rain. Then he crouched down and gently gathered the young woman in his arms. She moaned in discomfort, but didn't say anything.   
  
*   
  
The healer on duty in the palace exclaimed at the sight of the young man and handmaiden, both of them wet with rainwater, mud, and blood. Obi-Wan set the girl down on a bed as gently as he could, but she still wheezed. The healer rushed to the queen's side as the Jedi turned to go. "You," barked the healer. She gestured to the next bed. "Sit."   
  
"I'll be fine, I just need to have a bathe, is all," Obi-Wan protested, staggering.   
  
"Sit," snapped the healer again. He complied meekly, dripping on the sheets. The healer placed a screen between him and the next bed and began to remove the girl's clothes. "Who are you, and what happened?"   
  
His face grew warm. "I'm Obi-Wan Kenobi," he began. The healer nodded in comprehension. "I was running in the garden, trying to get out of the rain. She came out of nowhere," he finished lamely. He heard an exclamation of pain from the next bed. "Will she be all right?"   
  
"Hmmm." Silence, then a sound of disapproval. "Your highness, you have three bruised ribs. Let's get you wrapped up." Obi-Wan sat, head in his hands, and listened to the queen wheeze in discomfort as she was being treated. He heard the hiss of a hypospray, then silence.   
  
The healer moved the screen aside. Queen Amidala was lying in her bed, covered by a blanket. She looked a little dazed. "Yes, she'll be all right," said the healer. "Shall I inform Chancellor Bibble?" she asked the queen. The monarch nodded and closed her eyes.   
  
Then the healer really looked at Obi-Wan. "Yech. You do need a bathe." She rummaged through a closet and pulled out a towel and robe. "Go clean up and then come back here. The refresher is through that door." Obi-Wan held the clean garments away from his body and shuffled off, still dripping.   
  
When he emerged, the healer clucked over him as she settled him back in the bed, which was covered with fresh linens. She examined him, then applied ointment to his scrapes. She bandaged his right hand, which had lost the most skin, then ordered him stay there for the night. Obi-Wan hated being babied like this, but he settled back on his pillow and looked around as the healer turned out the light. He caught a glimpse of a serious, wide-eyed face gazing back at him before the room went dark.   
  
"I'm sorry," he murmured into the darkness.   
  
"It's not your fault," she replied. "Poodoo happens." The Jedi chuckled. The queen began to laugh too, but that was quickly replaced by a grimace. A moment later she said, "I've been worried about you, Master Kenobi."   
  
He frowned. _Master_ Kenobi. Jedi knights traditionally worked solo for their first decade or so, not taking padawans until they were much older and had more experience in the field – that was when the title of knight-master was conferred. The gravity of what he'd committed to do hit him.   
  
"Hey. You awake?"   
  
Obi-Wan shook himself out of his reverie. "I'm sorry, your highness. I was just thinking."   
  
"Did you enjoy it?" she teased. He snorted. She tried a different tactic. "Will you have dinner with me?"   
  
He was surprised. He found his voice and replied, "Yes, your highness."   
  
She breathed in raggedly. "As soon as we're both feeling better?"   
  
"I look forward to it." He could hear her breath even out as she began to doze. She turned her head, a flash of lightning illuminating her finely-shaped nose and long eyelashes. He laid awake for a long time and watched her sleep. But Obi-Wan's tired body overwhelmed his busy mind, and sleep finally overcame him, too.   
  
*   
  
The sun woke him a few hours later. Obi-Wan groaned and pressed his hands to the bed to push himself up, but was rewarded with sharp protests of pain. Remembering where he was, he looked to his right. Queen Amidala lay on her bed, still asleep. Only she didn't really look like a queen – just a young girl of fifteen or sixteen. Refracted sunlight illuminated a large bruise on her cheek.   
  
He winced. Obi-Wan didn't want to be here when she awakened. The young Jedi got out of bed, took his dirty cloak and put it on, bundled his clothes under his arm, and crept out of the room. A minute after the door shut behind him, he felt a stab of disappointment through the Force.   
  
***


	5. The Way You Look Tonight

_Someday, when I'm awfully low, when the world is cold,   
I will feel a glow just thinking of you, and the way you look tonight.   
  
You're so lovely, with your smile so warm, and your cheek so soft,   
There is nothing for me but to love you and the way you look tonight.   
  
With each word your tenderness grows, tearing my fears apart.   
And that laugh that wrinkles your nose touches my foolish heart.   
  
Yes, you're lovely. Never, never change. Keep that breathless charm.   
Won't you please arrange it, for I love you, just the way you look tonight._   
  
**"The Way You Look Tonight" - Frank Sinatra**

* * *

A few days later, most of Obi-Wan's cuts had healed, although there were a few sore spots left. He looked in the mirror and prepared to shave, then wondered, _Why?_ After more thought, the young Jedi did scrape the bristles from his chin and cheeks, but left the beginnings of a mustache on his upper lip. Newly-knighted, Obi-Wan was no longer bound by the traditional code with regard to padawans' appearances.   
  
Obi-Wan saw himself wince in the mirror, eyes bright. _Mustn't think of that now._ Immediately before Qui-Gon's funeral, Master Yoda had taken the slain master's place at Obi-Wan's knighting ceremony. The tiny Jedi reached up and cut Obi-Wan's braid off, then placed it at Master Jinn's side as Palace Guards approached with torches. If a padawan's master was dead, then it was the responsibility of someone in that master's line – the one who had trained the knight-master, or that trainer's trainer – to perform the ceremony, when possible. Master Yoda was three such "generations" before Obi-Wan, and the only Jedi living in that line; Qui-Gon was gone, Count Dooku had left the Jedi Order, and Yoda's knight-master had been dead for the better part of a millennium.   
  
Obi-Wan dragged his mind back to the present. A message from the queen had arrived that morning, stating that she was well. Young Kenobi felt awkward about dinner tonight, though socializing was part of what it was to be a Jedi. It's just that it was so soon, he was still so weary. He harrumphed at the grey hair that he'd first noticed a few days ago, then went to get dressed.   
  
Obi-Wan approached the queen's suite. He gulped, then signaled for entrance. One of the handmaidens opened the door. "Master Kenobi, welcome." She ushered him to a sopha, smiling. The girl excused herself and left the room, then returned with Queen Amidala.   
  
Obi-Wan stood as they entered. The bruise on the queen's face was gone; she looked as pretty as ever. She looked more like Padmé the handmaiden than Queen Amidala tonight. Her long-sleeved white dress and red embroidered overrobe whispered on the floor as she drew near. The young monarch wasn't wearing any of that heavy, ceremonial makeup, either. The Jedi bowed. "Your highness."  
  
"Good evening, Master Kenobi." The queen smiled and held out her hand in greeting. Obi-Wan grasped it, then on impulse, raised her hand to his lips and kissed it. Queen Amidala's nose scrunched as her smile broadened, making him reconsider the mustache. She released his hand and led him to the dining area, where their first course was already set out.   
  
Obi-Wan followed and held the young woman's chair as she sat, then seated himself to her right. "I have a question."   
  
One brown-black eyebrow lifted. "Yes?"  
  
"What is your real name?" He'd been wondering about that since the moment in the swamp, when she had stepped out from behind Sabé and laid bare her disguise to them all.   
  
She tilted her head a little to the side, seeming to consider. Then she smiled. "Padmé Naberrie."  
  
"Where does Amidala come from, then?" Obi-Wan asked.   
  
Padm's smile broadened. "It's my grandmother's family name. It can be prudent, even useful, for a public official to have a more...flamboyant name. But a handmaiden should remain faceless and anonymous."   
  
Obi-Wan shook his head. "That's something you never could be, your highness," he said. Padmé smiled and blushed, then busied herself with her soup. Fearing he had overstepped the boundaries of propriety, Obi-Wan turned his attention to the food, as well.   
  
They discussed many subjects as they ate. But whenever Padmé asked Obi-Wan a question about himself, he would lob it right back at her, or make a joke, or just busy himself with his meal. The Jedi's wit was quick and intelligent. He made her laugh several times, so she didn't mind the way he manipulated the conversation. 

But she didn't forget, either.  
  
When dessert was finished, a servant poured tea for them. They moved to the sitting room. The Jedi seated himself on a sopha; Padmé chose a large chair across from him. She gazed across the few meters that separated them and frowned, for he still seemed a little ill at ease. Ever the diplomat, Padmé decided to jettison the formality that had reigned thus far this evening. The queen adjusted her seat, tucking her legs underneath her. "Master Kenobi, you can talk about him. You've been avoiding it all evening."  
  
There was no sense in pretending that he didn't know who she was talking about. Obi-Wan glanced at the floor. Her shoes were there. The girl had a light heart, in spite of the heavy burdens she bore. This was a real person, maybe even a friend, not some figurehead.   
  
He had no one else to talk to, and he knew she was trustworthy. "I don't remember my birth parents. Master Qui-Gon was the only father I've known." Obi-Wan fell silent as his eyes grieved grey. Padmé didn't hurry him. "He died only a few meters away from me. If I'd only been a little faster, I could have stopped it." The knight's face was contorted, disgust with himself threatening to surface. Kenobi exhaled, sorrow surfing out of his body on his breath. "The Sith knocked me off one of the walkways and lured Master Qui-Gon ahead before I could catch up. And he followed, alone. I was trapped in the last segment of the corridor when it happened. I couldn't do anything." The Jedi's breath caught in his throat, and he said no more.   
  
Radiating compassion, Padmé got up from her sopha and moved to his side. She knelt next to him and took his hand. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know what happened after we left you two in the hangar."  
  
"It's all right," he murmured absently, eyes on the floor.   
  
She gazed at him, bewildered. How could he say such a thing? "How can it possibly be all right?"  
  
Obi-Wan looked at her – really looked. Gold sparks echoed out of the depths of her coffee-colored eyes. Obi-Wan was struck again by the contradiction that was Queen Padmé Amidala. Naberrie. She couldn't be a day older than fifteen, yet she was so wise. He was grateful once more for her hospitality and kindness in taking him in, and for her concern. That she cared enough make sure he was looked after in this manner.   
  
Thunder sounded outside. Padmé looked at the window, then got to her feet. "Oh," she groaned. "I was hoping that we could return to the labyrinth." She caught the puzzled look on his face. "It is not just a maze to be solved once and never returned to. It can be a refuge, to disregard the outside world and focus on the inner self." Padm's small hands gestured, echoing the essence of her words.   
  
"That's what you were doing there the other night," Obi-Wan said.   
  
"Yes," she replied. She glanced at the window once more. "But I have no wish to get sopping wet all over again." Padmé grinned at her guest. "Nor do I wish to wake up tomorrow in a healer's care."   
  
Obi-Wan rolled his eyes and stood. "It's getting late; you must have a busy schedule. Will you show me the maze some other time, your highness?"  
  
The queen also stood and held her hand out. "I'd love to. I have a function to attend at twenty-three hundred hours tomorrow, but I should be free after twenty-six. Will you meet me at the obelisk in the center at that time?" Obi-Wan shook her hand, and they moved to the door.   
  
"I look forward to it. Good night, your highness." Obi-Wan left her quarters and retired to his suite to think.

* * *

Adelaide, Darling! Thanks so much for the review, the one, lone review this story has gotten so far. Thanks for the characterization compliment, characterization is my biggest worry in fan fiction. How do I know what Obi-Wan or Luke or Vader would do in a given situation? I'm just mousy, underachieving me, after all, not some cunning Jedi warrior, no matter how much daydreaming I do...

Darth Writer's Block has run into me and flattened me like such roadkill, partially due to his Sithly knight-master, Darth Real Life, who now has me working two jobs. But you already know about that...

In any case, "Sabbatical" is in progress, I am tenaciously hanging onto it, refusing to let it drift into oblivion. But dang, it's hard figuring out where I'm gonna go with it. I do promise my readers here and on the other site where the story is archived, I will never abandon this until it is finished. (Unless I get hit by a bus or something, of course...)


End file.
